Hakentology

= Hakentology =

This is the information page for Hakentology! There are many reasons to be interested in Hakentology. Before you read on, here is a list of some of the great reasons for someone to assimilate with us:

We are currently THE fastest growing cult in the Creighton Prep community. We lead the nation in goat sacrifices made to Lord Smooze. Joining Hakentology makes you automatically at least 20% cooler than anyone in any other English period! Even if you are Martin! Our professional tattoo artists will permanently give you a free tattoo that marks you as a follower and servant to Lord Smooze! When Lord Smooze returns from the Chaos Dimension from His billion year imprisonment, He will reward his followers greatly! And burn everyone else!

What is Hakentology?
Hakentology is one of the hottest and freshest cults to come out of spite for the other English periods. We pride ourselves on the regular sacrifices of goats and on special occasions even freshmen! We do this so that on December 20th, 2012 (The Mayans didn't know it was a leap year) when Lords Smooze returns and plunges the world into eternal chaos, he may decide not to torture us forever for fun! We only use free range, organic goats for our weekly sacrifices to Lord Smooze A symbol you may expect to find drawn on the floor in freshman blood if you visit one of our meetings Here is a picture of the book we give our members that contains the specifics about Hakentology. An artists depiction of one of the many physical forms that Lord Smooze may decide to take during His reign of chaos. We didn't want to scare peoples kids by showing them the real picture. If we showed them that they would cry, and we need to be there to collect the tears to use in our rituals. Roughly translated, this says "Brad Pitt fully recognizes and endorses Hakentology as a valid cult option" Join Haketology TODAY!!!1